Comments on: Safe and Sorry Are Not the Only Options

By: Christine LaRocque

Christine LaRocque — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 02:37:10 +0000

I am SO guilty of this. Of over-thinking, over-worrying, over-planning to the point that almost all the fun is usually lost. At least for me. My husband is the opposite, he’s the risk-taker, the spontaneous one. I suppose in some ways we balance each other out, but largely my need to be safe and secure outweighs to just go with the flow and see where we get. Do I think my way is the right way? Absolutely not. But I’ve spent a lifetime like this and I don’t think I’m “brave enough” to be any different. Though somtimes I do with I could find a way to throw caution to the wind and be free of the worry.

By: Aileen

Aileen — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 18:33:00 +0000

Oh I do love this post. I was in Spain in March for a wedding it was in the middle of the annual Las Fallas Festival children were setting off fireworks in the streets and tossing them around while people were walking – myself and the other Americans were a bit freaked out because of all of our safety restraints that have been enforced on us all of our-lives. Seeing how free they were with the fires, firecrackers and everything else became a huge topic for us.
It did hit me – that our safety mindset increases our fear based thinking and it does take us of the edge of excitement – dare I say it neuters us – I feel that way

By: Zengirl @ Heart and Mind

Zengirl @ Heart and Mind — Mon, 21 Jun 2010 06:41:21 +0000

Belinda,

You bring up a important point. We all want safety and assurance but sometimes I think we over do safety issue and lose out on adventures and freedom. We can not have both.

By: Tracy Todd

Tracy Todd — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 15:57:57 +0000

I used to be extremely over cautious. I have relaxed… a lot. And life is more fun.

I think the opposite of safe is responsible. I think it’s important to be responsible but it is just as important to really live life and that means taking a risk every once in a while.

I don’t always leave a comment but I want you to know that I always read your posts. I find your writing so inspiring. Thank you!

By: Sarah

Sarah — Sun, 20 Jun 2010 02:41:09 +0000

There was a saying I used to live by as a teen:
“Fly high
Fall hard.”
I don’t know if I’ve ever stopped living that way.
Even as a mom. Even in my parenting.
I think safety is wise but…too prevalent in our society.
Great reward comes with some modicum of risk, right?

By: Katie

Katie — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 13:22:33 +0000

Hey Melissa, interesting post. Yes, I think safety and comfort do numb us. We live in a culture of fear, from terrorist threat alerts to pandemics, but it’s mostly just hype to sell us something. It’s natural to want to feel safe, but the media plays on that fear so we watch, then buy stuff that makes us feel safe. Living in the moment, you realize that most of your past fears never materialized and most never will. Now for sure, keep that kid away from the stacks of produce, but set him free to bump his knee or make mistakes. Maybe he’ll grow up feeling safe and being fearless.

By: Colleen

Colleen — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 03:01:05 +0000

Hi Belinda,
this is a good post. We all have our own comfort zones.

I love to talk to strangers.
GPS is the greatest thing ever invented because I can get no off the beaten track just for the adventure without getting lost.
I abhor chemical companies for poisoning peoples minds and scaring them into using hand sterilizers and the like.
I don’t worry about dying because I have had a good life so far and if I went now I would be satisfied. (no slow painful deaths though please).

Be a mother scares the living daylights out of me. I have spent most of my kids lives worrying about stuff that rarely happens and when it does we get by and its never as bad a my imagination sees it. Crazy hey but I’m working on it.

By: Dia

Dia — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 01:31:09 +0000

I think we all want to feel safe Belinda. Some times people are afraid to leave their comfort zone and do something new or something that they feel is “unsafe.” Once we start taking small risks, we would begin to challenge the situations that we feel not safe about. Thanks for sharing Belinda

By: Wilma Ham

Wilma Ham — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 00:28:01 +0000

Once I would have packed a knife too, just in case. Indeed in the end where do you stop?
For me I have found safety in knowing that I can find solutions to any problems that I will encounter. I have learned to say ‘yes’ to new adventures and lo and behold when I came across problems, like not being able to get off an island, like not having plasters when on a tramping trip lasting days, there were always solutions to be found. That has given me confidence to do more and more ‘dangerous’ things and LIVE. xox Wilma

By: BigLittleWolf

BigLittleWolf — Fri, 18 Jun 2010 20:30:50 +0000

I think we grow more concerned with safety as we grow older. We have actually seen or weathered tragedy. We know what a moment of looking away can bring. Loss takes on the quality of a body memory, and so it is natural that we seek to protect those we love, and ourselves.

Of course if we overdo it, we don’t experience life. But some of us have fewer resources to absorb loss, and so safety of all sorts becomes paramount.